Nicci Morris

Silence: Golden or deafening? Decide for yourself

In Lifestyle, Spirituality on March 12, 2011 at 12:53 am

Someone I know spends about 50 percent (if not more) of her waking hours on the telephone. When she’s not on the phone, she has the television on, at obscene volume levels. When she’s not not watching television (that’s not a typo, by the way… more often than not she doesn’t watch the show that is on), the radio or a CD is blaring. Based on my perspective and what I know about her, I believe this is a subconscious way for her to avoid uncomfortable issues and personal demons.

Over the years, she has shared with me tales of physical, verbal and emotional abuse she suffered at the hands of her parents and her siblings. She tells the same stories over and over, and she speaks about them in a way that lets me know the things she experienced continue to define her. An occasional armchair psychologist, I’ve analyzed what she’s told me over the years and it seems that instead of using her experiences — from her childhood and from more recent years — to motivate her, she is mired in them. Rather than sharing her stories to encourage and inspire, she recounts them, usually verbatim, in what seem to be petitions for pity or to upstage others when they go through tough times. Perhaps you also know someone who is always more upset, more hurt, more ill, more in need, etc… than everyone else. They can’t seem to resist the urge to one-up other people.

This person I know has a record playing in her head. She has rehearsed and memorized the negative lyrics. She knows the discordance by heart. Rather than pen a new verse and figure out how to create an internal melody, she fills her days with external noise.

I challenge you to create moments of silence in your life if you don’t already. If you are not familiar with this, you might find it is “too quiet,” or that you are uncomfortable with the lack of buzz around you. Fight your way through the initial discomfort and the racing thoughts. I promise it will pass as you give in to the lack of sound. Even if it just for the 20 minutes you spend getting dressed in the morning or the 40 minutes it takes you to commute to or from work, work to create intentional quiet in your life. Allow your thoughts, emotions and spirit to do what they may in those precious pockets of nothingness. Dismiss the low-energy buzz of chaos and usher in an environment that allows you to discover and connect with your divine and empowered self. Doing so lets your inner rudder, rather than outside influences, keep you on the path to your purpose.

Resist the urge to fill your days with noisy distractions that keep you bogged down by past of present hurts. God, peace, answers, healing, understanding, growth and so much more flourish in silence. See how silence can shift from deafening to defining.

Give quiet a go and be amazed by the powerful things you hear.


  1. Awesome i like this post as well…
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